Because I was searching for Bhante Dhammika's online glossary of Buddhist terms for Albert, I chanced across this post:
http://sdhammika.blogspot.com/2008/11/belated-but-better-for-it.html
It reminded me of the fates of my grandfather and my father.
This is why we must waste no time in saving ourselves. This is why we must waste no time in saving those around us. This is why we do Buddhist youth work.
4 comments:
This post touched me after having a turbulent night. Last night, i was irritated after work that i have vented out my displeasure to a friend of mine in a sarcastic way.
I have regretted my action. I dwell in my emotions easily without any mindfulness. I could not let go and have dreams throughout the night. I knew that my mind is not in peace.
This is so challenging when we are ware of our emotions and overcome them is a big challenge.
Thanks a lot Kwek and Albertoh for your sharing.. What a sad story.. I was also struck by something Bhante said: Despite his deep interest I noticed a strong restlessness and dissatisfaction in him. I encouraged him to do mindfulness of breathing and metta bhavana and it helped a bit but I suspected that his mind was too ‘set in its ways.’
Needless to say, at times i have strong restlessness and dissatisfaction in me too..due to too much thinking and desire etc.. this affect my meditation very badly(but btw i do self-guided meditation once in many many months), both breathing n metta.. its just getting worse&worse..=((( and despite my good interest in dhamma etc,, i think one should always cultivate the meditation practice ya?? and thats what i really fare badly and hope for a change! hope, but never do..
Then there is also this reply:
I feel sorry too about Dr Chee and I think it showed that intellectual wisdom had, unfortunately, not much to do with spiritual/experiential one.
i definitely feel intellectual wisdom is of good help,, yet again,, this post has reminded us that we might not have been progressing well as we may thought we have been.. get what i mean?? given the so many things, for example, the control/mastery of our EMO , like for Dr Chee' experience.... and so, how does one exactly measure one's spiritual progress??? excel in meditation?? the calmness etc one exudes??? i know a few people(besides the Sangha of course) who i believe have attained that progress( at least from their look/aura of peace,, little anger,, little delusion,, little greed,, little desire (little by my standard by the way).. you just can feel it.. you know they have made good progress.. can we just take it,, its normal to go back and forth and back and forth?? but surely thats not progress?
There is this quote also by Venerable Bodhi if i dont remember wrongly, that Defilements assail us everytime.. the only antiodte is to be mindful... Albertoh,, i reall feel what you have been doing all this while have always been half battles won liao... So its very good le and rejoice for that and just keep fighting to win the whole battle each time..lose nvm.. everyone loses too aniway..
aniway, wait, i suddenly think of something i used to think lol,, so just practice, practice n practice(be it mindfulness etc),, then progress,, then degress-- progress etc,, its not bad already, slowly progress....
but is it Really Not Bad??? is it Really Slowly Progress?? haha..
i hope i have not been writing too much unnecessary stuffs..
no isen it wasn't unnecessary at all! it's always nice to have you guys to share thoughts with...
i think that if we're beginning to have doubts whether we're progressing, we should try something different...
like going for a meditation retreat and challenging ourselves? despite screwing up my previous meditation retreat experience, i think i benefitted a great deal and learnt alot more about my mind and about meditation, driving me on for another retreat in dec... hope this one i can just let go of my expectations and just meditate.
or if we think our problem is karmic obstructions, we can do some repentance? like prostrations or make some aspiration and carry it out and dedicate the merits towards nibanna...
especially for meditation, although i'm struggling just like everyone haha, i think sometimes it needs to be given a boost of energy to be put back on the right track...
hey thanks Kwek! very good suggestions............
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